Stories from the Therapy Room: I Really Want to Talk to Someone, but I Don't Know Who to Turn To

An international student told me:

「I really want to talk to someone, but I don't know who to turn to.」

I asked him, who do you want to talk to?

He said:

「Talk to friends? They have their own pressures too. I don't want to be that person who dumps 'negative energy' on them.」

「Talk to my parents? They'd worry, or they'd give me 'advice,' but I just want someone to listen.」

「Talk to the school counselor? They don't speak the language, they don't understand the culture, and I'm worried about whether it'll be on record.」

He said:

「I actually need professional support, but I don't know where to find it, and I'm afraid to look.」

「And I also don't know, does this even count as being 'sick'?」

I talked with him for a long time.

Finally he said:

「Maybe I really can find someone to talk to.」

「Not because I 'have a problem,' but because I need support too.」

A girl told me:

「Sometimes I really want to talk to someone, but I don't know who.」

「I'm afraid to reach out to friends—they'll think I'm 'too negative.'」

「I'm afraid to reach out to my parents—they'll worry, and then they'll say 'don't overthink it.'」

「I'm afraid to reach out to a therapist, because I'm not sure if I'm 'serious enough.'」

She said:

「Sometimes I think, maybe if I find a counselor who speaks Chinese, that could work.」

「Because at least they'd understand the language and the culture, so I wouldn't have to explain everything.」

「But I don't know where to find one.」

A boy told me:

「Sometimes I've been holding on for so long, I really want to let it out.」

「But I don't know who to tell, and I'm afraid of being judged.」

「I'm afraid people will think I'm 'being dramatic' or 'too fragile.'」

「So I've just been holding it in alone this whole time.」

He said:

「Once I really couldn't hold on anymore, I wanted to find someone to talk to.」

「But I scrolled through my contacts and didn't know who to reach out to.」

「In the end, I cried alone in my room for a long time, then wiped my tears, and the next day kept pretending everything was 'fine.'」

A lot of international students feel this way:

They really want to talk to someone, but they don't know who.

They're afraid of burdening friends, worried about their parents, concerned about language barriers with school counselors.

So they choose to hold on alone, until they can't anymore.

But therapy isn't only for people who are "sick."

Sometimes, you just need a place where you can say things you can't say to your parents.

Someone who won't judge you, someone who won't give you "advice."

Someone who just listens.

If you're an international student and you feel this way too:

Maybe you could find a Chinese-speaking therapist to talk to.

Not because you "have a problem," but because you deserve to be supported too.

I'm in Manchester, and I specialize in therapy for international students.

If you'd like to talk, feel free to message me.

If you're a parent, reading this, maybe you could forward this to your child:

"I found this therapist who seems to really understand how you feel. Want to give it a try? I'll pay, no pressure on you."

Give them a choice, not a demand.

I'm in Manchester, and I specialize in therapy for international students.

Services available in both Chinese and English, online sessions.

If you'd like to talk, feel free to message me.